One of the things that had the biggest impact on me while I was in Waveland was actually very simple. But I think it's funny how those simple, basic things are often the most vital bits you need for life and yet you totally over look.
We met a woman, Janet, who is just now getting her house built back. Before Katrina I think her family had a house there for atleast 50 years. They had passed their land down for several generations. She's less than 200 yards from the beach front and was planning to stay through Katrina like she'd done with other storms, until it was moved up to a category 5 storm. She evacuated to Florida, and after the storm passed and the waters went down came back to live in a tent on her land. She said that with all the debris, it was basically like taking a tent to a landfill and living there. She came back to no house, no job, she'd lost friends, neighbors...then there was the long process of trying to locate people who left.
So in all of the stories she told us about her life through and after the hurricane, a couple things struck me most. The first was her attitude about work. After the storm, she hadn't even really thought about working yet. A woman drove by and stopped by Janet's land and asked if anyone needed a job. At that moment it hit her that she had no job anymore. So she quickly jumped at the chance to work. She became part of the cleanup crew for her town. I can't imagine already having to face going through all the debris of my own home, but also having to go through everyone else's. But she said something that really changed me. She said she was grateful for the job not just because it was work, but it gave her the chance to be part of the solution. She said after the storm she learned to be grateful for what she is able to do, anything that she could do herself, she wants to do because she knows its such a gift. I'd say before I met her, I had an attitude much like she said she did before Katrina. There are a lot of things I could do myself but I'd rather let someone else do for me because it would take more effort for me than them.
Janet also told us about coming back to a place where there was nothing left but debris. When you go through a disaster like Katrina, she said you learn what's really important. It's fire and water, plants and animals, friends and family. And it's the invisible things that hold them together. It's love and the like that are unseen but most important. And it's the invisible that no one and nothing in this world can take away. Often people would say that as much as Katrina took away, it gave back so much more because they appreciate that now. I'm starting to see it too...
Monday, August 24, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Pieces of Waveland
I just got home from Waveland Mississippi a couple days ago. As dramatic and cliche as it may sound to say "I am forever changed" yet again after a mission trip, it is true. I have so much to share after that won't all fit into one blog post, so I'm just gonna start with this bit.
I think going into a place devastated by a storm such as Katrina, you expect wear and tear, you expect there to be major damage. But nothing prepares you for the nothing. Simple concrete squares and a few beams are the only remains of the houses that once stood so strong. Weeds and dying trees stand where families used to be in their yards. Nothing.
One dear woman described their struggle to rebuild something like this... "You take a child out to that beach, and they'll start shaping tunnels and finding ways to run the water in to the sand and such. They'll shape it into something that works better, they'll leave their mark. We can throw up our hands in despair. But we can all shape our world, we can all change our world and impact it somehow. You look around at all the mess and you say 'Well I've got an extra tent, I've got some old bathtub, and I've got this old wood stove, how can I use this to make our lives better?' and you do what you can and use what you do have." She turned that stuff into a small bath house of sorts for friends and neighbors. And that's how they've been doing this. Bit by bit. Living in tents around debris heaps, sharing found bits of debris with neighbors 'till some kind of mementos are restored. Opening already shattered lives to the volunteers, the strangers who come to offer help. They pull together the bit they can from what was, and look forward with thankfulness to what is and will be.
The people we met persevere in tragedy and human failings. They are thankful for the simple help and love we came to bring. The people understand the difference between what you need and what you want. Between stuff and what is truly valuable beyond monetary payment.
I held the pieces in my hands, and I can't forget it. I can't forget the emptiness of the land, the debris that still lies waiting to be found. I can't forget the people who face the devastation and rebuild shattered dreams and lives. Finding new dreams, new life, and renewed hope in something more than what is tangible.
A piece of a steel and concrete wall from a house in Waveland.
How can I say what flooded my heart as I held the bits of the homes of people in Waveland? I held pieces of the houses where they made their homes. Not just pretty little houses where they lived it up on the beach, but the place where their families had lived for generations, houses that they had strengthened to with stand many storms before. All my judgements and preconceived notions were put to shame and revealed for the foolishness they were.
I think going into a place devastated by a storm such as Katrina, you expect wear and tear, you expect there to be major damage. But nothing prepares you for the nothing. Simple concrete squares and a few beams are the only remains of the houses that once stood so strong. Weeds and dying trees stand where families used to be in their yards. Nothing.
One dear woman described their struggle to rebuild something like this... "You take a child out to that beach, and they'll start shaping tunnels and finding ways to run the water in to the sand and such. They'll shape it into something that works better, they'll leave their mark. We can throw up our hands in despair. But we can all shape our world, we can all change our world and impact it somehow. You look around at all the mess and you say 'Well I've got an extra tent, I've got some old bathtub, and I've got this old wood stove, how can I use this to make our lives better?' and you do what you can and use what you do have." She turned that stuff into a small bath house of sorts for friends and neighbors. And that's how they've been doing this. Bit by bit. Living in tents around debris heaps, sharing found bits of debris with neighbors 'till some kind of mementos are restored. Opening already shattered lives to the volunteers, the strangers who come to offer help. They pull together the bit they can from what was, and look forward with thankfulness to what is and will be.
The people we met persevere in tragedy and human failings. They are thankful for the simple help and love we came to bring. The people understand the difference between what you need and what you want. Between stuff and what is truly valuable beyond monetary payment.
I held the pieces in my hands, and I can't forget it. I can't forget the emptiness of the land, the debris that still lies waiting to be found. I can't forget the people who face the devastation and rebuild shattered dreams and lives. Finding new dreams, new life, and renewed hope in something more than what is tangible.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Guatemala
I wasn't sure what to expect out of a trip back to Guatemala. I've said that before. How to explain what I saw in a new way, well I don't really think I can.
I saw things in Guatemala that I've seen before, things I've often played over in my mind day after day. It's the beggars, the people who appear to work so hard every day and yet have so little in my American perspective. I heard children who have been abandoned, hurt, or orphaned worshiping God in a language I can't understand with my mind but can join in with my heart and tears fill my eyes. The worship in different languages and cultures always gets me, because it's right there, I think the Spirit is just practically screaming the greatness and vastness of our Father. Our God who is not bound by culture or language or space, but His love so great and poured out for all people on this beautiful earth.
I was reminded over and over that happiness and the joy that comes from my Savior has nothing to do with what you hold in your hands but everything with the love and hope you have in your heart. But also that the smallest possession given by the compelling of love can bring the biggest smile I've ever seen.
I was reminded that adoption isn't just a nice thing to do, it's an act of God. There is no other way to explain how two little Guatemala babies are now safely sleeping in their home here in the States after being born into hunger and poverty. And seeing how much He's done to care for us here in this fleeting life proves to me how much greater He has provided for my eternal life with Him.
I was challenged to go deeper, to strive for more, that there is SO much more to be learned in my faith. I was reminded of how easily I can slip into complacency here in my "perfect" world away from deep material needs, but that great new adventures in this breath of a life await if I will take that first step.
I was reminded of what my Savior looks like, I saw Him in children's eyes, I heard His joy in their songs, I recognized His hope in their dreams and plans and talents. I saw His redemption and healing in a home where children find refuge and provision and love. And I saw His heart break as His creation walked streets begging for some bit of change, hungry people in need of a gospel that speaks more than just words and emotions.
I've seen it all before, I'm sure I meet my Savior every day. But it's so much easier to have our hearts open on those great and special one week trips out of the year. I'm pretty sure Jesus is who He is always, and I'm pretty sure if we were who we claimed to be we would see that a lot more clearly. It doesn't take Guatemala or Africa or a homeless shelter to see it, it's where ever you-are letting your heart open to a Love that can make your heart see and give much more than that selfish flesh ever could. So where ever our God takes us, Africa, Guatemala, China, the grocery store or across the hall, God is still God. Who are we?
I saw things in Guatemala that I've seen before, things I've often played over in my mind day after day. It's the beggars, the people who appear to work so hard every day and yet have so little in my American perspective. I heard children who have been abandoned, hurt, or orphaned worshiping God in a language I can't understand with my mind but can join in with my heart and tears fill my eyes. The worship in different languages and cultures always gets me, because it's right there, I think the Spirit is just practically screaming the greatness and vastness of our Father. Our God who is not bound by culture or language or space, but His love so great and poured out for all people on this beautiful earth.
I was reminded over and over that happiness and the joy that comes from my Savior has nothing to do with what you hold in your hands but everything with the love and hope you have in your heart. But also that the smallest possession given by the compelling of love can bring the biggest smile I've ever seen.
I was reminded that adoption isn't just a nice thing to do, it's an act of God. There is no other way to explain how two little Guatemala babies are now safely sleeping in their home here in the States after being born into hunger and poverty. And seeing how much He's done to care for us here in this fleeting life proves to me how much greater He has provided for my eternal life with Him.
I was challenged to go deeper, to strive for more, that there is SO much more to be learned in my faith. I was reminded of how easily I can slip into complacency here in my "perfect" world away from deep material needs, but that great new adventures in this breath of a life await if I will take that first step.
I was reminded of what my Savior looks like, I saw Him in children's eyes, I heard His joy in their songs, I recognized His hope in their dreams and plans and talents. I saw His redemption and healing in a home where children find refuge and provision and love. And I saw His heart break as His creation walked streets begging for some bit of change, hungry people in need of a gospel that speaks more than just words and emotions.
I've seen it all before, I'm sure I meet my Savior every day. But it's so much easier to have our hearts open on those great and special one week trips out of the year. I'm pretty sure Jesus is who He is always, and I'm pretty sure if we were who we claimed to be we would see that a lot more clearly. It doesn't take Guatemala or Africa or a homeless shelter to see it, it's where ever you-are letting your heart open to a Love that can make your heart see and give much more than that selfish flesh ever could. So where ever our God takes us, Africa, Guatemala, China, the grocery store or across the hall, God is still God. Who are we?
Thursday, June 11, 2009
People
So the following is just some thoughts I'd scribbled in my notebook.
People.
Here I am in Wake Forest, NC. About to leave for Guatemala on Friday. So excited, so expectant, and so sure God is and will be moving. As I've been out a bit here, sitting in a food court at the mall, meeting beautiful adoptive families, seeing a homeless man walking the sides of the road-all his possessions on his back-on the way from the airport. Checked out i-heart and read a story about a girl who was kidnapped and a sex slave. I am over whelmed by the way God is opening my heart and eyes.
People. It's never hit me in such a way before. People created in the image of God. Every person is a soul. Thinking about that, every face I meet is eternal, created-loved-known by God the Father, Christ died for each one. Oh how the Father loves each! I'm amazed at His Spirit in me, pushing me to reach out my redeemed life and love others with mine. This life is such a gift, such glimpse/moment/flash of what is to come. How I live affects every single persons eternity. Sounds lofty? No. My Creator made and formed each of us, lovingly, for this time.
This life. we make it seem so simple and singular to the self. We are all on this same earth. He has each of us here for a reason. We are "created to do good works," works predestined to bring glory-children,people- to God.
People. soul, eternity, creation, loved, beautiful, needy, spirit. People, there are many to be loved. But there is a Love greater than our numbers or population, and it's poured into us who know Salvation to be poured out again. It's never ending, forever flowing awesome Love.
Hope you got this, I know for me I've never been so over whelmed just by seeing another person. But if you stop to think about, each face you see is something really profound. You are looking into eternity, that person has a soul and a Creator who desperately wants to spend eternity with them. Love is for all people.
Love. People.
People.
Here I am in Wake Forest, NC. About to leave for Guatemala on Friday. So excited, so expectant, and so sure God is and will be moving. As I've been out a bit here, sitting in a food court at the mall, meeting beautiful adoptive families, seeing a homeless man walking the sides of the road-all his possessions on his back-on the way from the airport. Checked out i-heart and read a story about a girl who was kidnapped and a sex slave. I am over whelmed by the way God is opening my heart and eyes.
People. It's never hit me in such a way before. People created in the image of God. Every person is a soul. Thinking about that, every face I meet is eternal, created-loved-known by God the Father, Christ died for each one. Oh how the Father loves each! I'm amazed at His Spirit in me, pushing me to reach out my redeemed life and love others with mine. This life is such a gift, such glimpse/moment/flash of what is to come. How I live affects every single persons eternity. Sounds lofty? No. My Creator made and formed each of us, lovingly, for this time.
This life. we make it seem so simple and singular to the self. We are all on this same earth. He has each of us here for a reason. We are "created to do good works," works predestined to bring glory-children,people- to God.
People. soul, eternity, creation, loved, beautiful, needy, spirit. People, there are many to be loved. But there is a Love greater than our numbers or population, and it's poured into us who know Salvation to be poured out again. It's never ending, forever flowing awesome Love.
Hope you got this, I know for me I've never been so over whelmed just by seeing another person. But if you stop to think about, each face you see is something really profound. You are looking into eternity, that person has a soul and a Creator who desperately wants to spend eternity with them. Love is for all people.
Love. People.
Monday, June 8, 2009
pride-part 50 million
I'm about to leave for Guatemala in few days, a mission trip to visit and work for some beautiful orphans. I'm so excited and keep thinking about last year when I went to China for a trip kind of like this. I've been thinking today about pride, I think the Spirit is trying to remind me to be aware of this, be surrendering this flesh in advance this time around. Last year was a painful wake up call that just because I might not have a mirror or camera in my face 24/7 doesn't mean I can't have a problem with pride and self.
It's so easy to get bound up in pride, to fall into it's grasp and live a life there. It's easy to be caught up in yourself, so frustratingly easy. I despise and crave pride at the same time, it sounds a bit weird but that's the human in me I suppose. The Spirit knows that this self is the last thing I need, but the 'old man' -woman in this case- constantly craves attention. The old desires thoughts of self, how does everything affect me, how do I feel, what do I want, it's a maddening and destructive cycle.
Even in surrendering pride, pride still can find a way to slide into your life. Making you think that it's all about you getting your focus off yourself, which is just a crazy circle that comes right back to where it's doesn't need to be. Often I try as David said to "take my life into my own hands," and so wash away my sin with my dirty hands, but self can not get rid of its very own self.
The thing is, I want to use this life to bear Love's heart out into this world I'm in, but I can't bear Love's heart if I'm too busy bearing out my selfishness on my life. When I'm focused on myself, that will bear out in my actions and life each day whether I realize it or like it. But when I gaze faithfully and passionately at Love above all else, it will inevitably show in my life.
Love
It's so easy to get bound up in pride, to fall into it's grasp and live a life there. It's easy to be caught up in yourself, so frustratingly easy. I despise and crave pride at the same time, it sounds a bit weird but that's the human in me I suppose. The Spirit knows that this self is the last thing I need, but the 'old man' -woman in this case- constantly craves attention. The old desires thoughts of self, how does everything affect me, how do I feel, what do I want, it's a maddening and destructive cycle.
Even in surrendering pride, pride still can find a way to slide into your life. Making you think that it's all about you getting your focus off yourself, which is just a crazy circle that comes right back to where it's doesn't need to be. Often I try as David said to "take my life into my own hands," and so wash away my sin with my dirty hands, but self can not get rid of its very own self.
The thing is, I want to use this life to bear Love's heart out into this world I'm in, but I can't bear Love's heart if I'm too busy bearing out my selfishness on my life. When I'm focused on myself, that will bear out in my actions and life each day whether I realize it or like it. But when I gaze faithfully and passionately at Love above all else, it will inevitably show in my life.
Love
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